Juicy's Audition

OMG!!!! I am so super sorry!!! I know you’ve probably had a long day, but so have I----gosh you wouldn’t believe the day I had and I know that ‘technically’ I’ve missed my audition time---but it’s not ‘technically’ my fault….and I flew all the way from Flippety-Flop Nowheresville for the sole purpose of this audition----gosh, I will just die if you don’t let me audition… (steps into spotlight –looks into the light) Pardon? Oh thank you so much---you won’t regret it! Oh, ok---my slate, right. So do you want just my name or my name and my agency? Oh ---ok…

Hi, I'm JC ---like as in J-period, C-period----and like I know what your all thinking right? Like JC as in Jesus Christ---but no, it doesn't stand for that---it doesn't ---because--it just doesn't ok? I mean, for a while there I went through a faze where I un-capitalized my name so as not to be offensive to Jesus, but like I’m totally over that now…(looks up) no offense - Upper case J dot Upper case C dot, ----I just don’t do it anymore, out of respect to myself, yeah, SUB-versive!….. Anyways my name is actually pronounced JUICY ---get it? JC - JUICY---as in "I'm juicy! I don't care what you say. I'm JUICY!"

(steps forward looking into the light) Pardon? (pause) oh right, sorry----just my name and agency---right sorry, sometimes my mouth just goes on and on and on-----and that causes me to be…

tardy? ----what a great word eh? ‘Tardy.’ Say it, it’s totally a fun word to say. I love words. I am a connoisseur of words if you will. Yeah, I collect them. But only the totally fun ones, like I would NEVER collect a word like ‘math’ (shudders – and continues to gag herself…)…..but words like ‘lickety-split’ ---how can you not be happy when you say that? OR ---‘Bangkok’ ----that’s like a 2 for 1 deal, or ‘thespian’---makes me giggle every time, cause you know what I’m really thinking right? (whispers LESBIAN…) Or ‘Pescetarian’ – which I’m not sure if you know this but it’s like a vegetarian only they eat fish…yeah, SUB-versive…. (steps forward and looks into the light) pardon? Oh right, sorry, my bad---name and agency --- right. There goes my motor mouth again. It’s because I’m a red-head. Yeah all red-heads are total leaky faucets when it comes to verbal diaherra . But I totally love being a red-head. I mean NOW I do. But when I was a kid it was doom-some. (which side-bar --- is another totally fun word to say….DOOMSOME --- it kinda reminds me of Dim sum---which I totally love right?) But the teasing and the torture - it just wasn't fair. But "fair" is such a subjective word, right? "Red headed woodpecker" - I mean lets face it, anything that ends with pecker, is just not cool. "Freckle face, carrot top", to which my cleverest reply was, "Carrot tops are green!" ohhhhhh, that was a good one, I really told them eh?! But like I said I totally love being a red-head NOW cause red-heads have more fun. Yep---just like my shirt says. At first, I totally wasn’t going to buy this shirt, because it’s red. And anyone who's a red-head can totally attest to this ---- redheads are NOT supposed to wear red, cause apparently it clashes with--- US. I am SO brave!!!
Peace, Love, and I Heart Juicy so much it hurts!!!
xoT.